Speedplay

Started by FantasyWriter, January 17, 2014, 09:25:10 PM

Quote from: long live miley cyrus on February 26, 2014, 01:40:51 PM
And no one will ever catch me!

I smell a rat.
Quote from: BadSkeelz
Ah well you should just kill those PCs. They're not worth the time of plotting creatively against.

Quote from: long live miley cyrus on February 26, 2014, 01:40:51 PM
The last of my family has disappeared for reasons that I, a young man/woman so insane as to be incapable of any more than basic work, have no conception of at all. I've decided to go and pursue my dream, now that my family can't exactly tell me not to and no one mentioned anything about after they were dead except several instances of "Don't you freakin' dare go do that thing you've always wanted to do if we happen to be gone one day and leave you alone," but, hey, that is obviously so generalized so that it could mean anything.

Anyway, here I am, pursuing my life-long dream of sneaking past apartment renters, breaking into peoples' rooms, touching their belongings, and watching them as they sleep. Watching them for hours. Touch their belongings some more. Eat a piece of meat I found in a bag. Watch them some more.

And then as they wake up I'll be hiding inside a container and watch them some more! And watch them and listen to them until they leave. Or bring a prostitute in. Yeah. That's kind of a deal killer, so, I'll bust out of the container and run for the door if that ever happens. I'll scream lots and lots, in order to create confusion and make my presence less noticeable.

And no one will ever catch me!

Bonus points if you burst out of the box fully unclothed. Like... what... the... FUCK, was that about?!

EDIT: Except the face-wrap, don't forget that.
Quote from: Nyr
Dead elves can ride wheeled ladders just fine.
Quote from: bcw81
"You can never have your mountainhome because you can't grow a beard."
~Tektolnes to Thrain Ironsword

Fade in from black, a gritty, aerial view of Allanak. House Fale is having an extravagent party/orgy. 'Gickers are living in extravagance in their Den of iniquity. Fade out to black.

Narrating voice of main character: "If'n ya only had a month ta' live... and a goal wurth dyin' for... wouldncha' go out swingin'?"

Fade in from black, aerial view of a makeshift shack, zoom in to a sawbones doctor looking at a dwarf's junk.

"Yep... hope trainin' a gith ta give head was worth it, stump. You've got maybe... two weeks? Think you're gonna die satisfied?"

"No... I've a new path ta' follow..."

Iorek Githfucker was your average Rinthi dwarven assassin. Until the day he fulfilled his focus. Now, with only one month to live until gith rot takes him from the junk up, he has one month to complete his new focus:

Close up on Githfucker's face; "I'm gonna' shank the Highlord."

Now, with only two weeks on the clock, and only an absolutely incredible in strength and subguild tailor to assure coin with no repercussions in his arsenal, Iorek must battle against racism, a poor in wisdom, spam-training backstab in the Rinth without staff catching on, and, hot dwarf on 'gicker action as he mudsexes his way to the necessary buffs.

Voluptuous woman in loose, water-hued robes, "Oh, Githfucker... take me..."

See the excitement!
Feel the baldness!
Wince at the code abuse!
This Summer, Ioreth Githfucker IS

TWINKING HARD


HAHAHAHA
Quote from: Gimfalisette
The rest of you, if you see a blingy, buff brunette-blonde pair hanging out together pretty soon at your local bar, just...it's nothing. Move along. (Do not hit on them.)

I'd approve that app.
Quote from: RockScissors are fine.  Please nerf paper.

Oh my god do this.
Quote from: Agameth
Goat porn is not prohibited in the Highlord's city.

Quote
Whatever happens, happens.

Quote from: Asche on March 05, 2014, 06:38:09 PM
Fade in from black, a gritty, aerial view of Allanak. House Fale is having an extravagent party/orgy. 'Gickers are living in extravagance in their Den of iniquity. Fade out to black.

Narrating voice of main character: "If'n ya only had a month ta' live... and a goal wurth dyin' for... wouldncha' go out swingin'?"

Fade in from black, aerial view of a makeshift shack, zoom in to a sawbones doctor looking at a dwarf's junk.

"Yep... hope trainin' a gith ta give head was worth it, stump. You've got maybe... two weeks? Think you're gonna die satisfied?"

"No... I've a new path ta' follow..."

Iorek Githfucker was your average Rinthi dwarven assassin. Until the day he fulfilled his focus. Now, with only one month to live until gith rot takes him from the junk up, he has one month to complete his new focus:

Close up on Githfucker's face; "I'm gonna' shank the Highlord."

Now, with only two weeks on the clock, and only an absolutely incredible in strength and subguild tailor to assure coin with no repercussions in his arsenal, Iorek must battle against racism, a poor in wisdom, spam-training backstab in the Rinth without staff catching on, and, hot dwarf on 'gicker action as he mudsexes his way to the necessary buffs.

Voluptuous woman in loose, water-hued robes, "Oh, Githfucker... take me..."

See the excitement!
Feel the baldness!
Wince at the code abuse!
This Summer, Ioreth Githfucker IS

TWINKING HARD



Fu----king----wyn.
Quote from: Twilight on January 22, 2013, 08:17:47 PMGreb - To scavenge, forage, and if Whira is with you, loot the dead.
Grebber - One who grebs.

Super wyn.

That's hilarious.
Wynning since October 25, 2008.

Quote from: Ami on November 23, 2010, 03:40:39 PM
>craft newbie into good player

You accidentally snap newbie into useless pieces.


Discord:The7DeadlyVenomz#3870

Every goddamn time, man. Every time someone makes a funny dwarf post I want to make a stumpy.
Quote from: Agameth
Goat porn is not prohibited in the Highlord's city.


Quote from: Asche on March 06, 2014, 04:03:01 PM
Quote from: Rahnevyn on March 05, 2014, 06:45:51 PM
I'd approve that app.

I'll hold you to that.

Approve it and then SLAY YOU IN THE HALL OF KINGS BEFORE YOU CAN POINT AT ANYTHING.
Quote from: RockScissors are fine.  Please nerf paper.

NO RAHN YOU MUSTN'T. IT IS FOR THE GOOD OF THE GAME THAT THIS CHARACTER IS A REAL THING. PLZPLZPLZ
Quote from: Agameth
Goat porn is not prohibited in the Highlord's city.

Ioreth Githfucker isn't in danger.

He IS the danger.
Quote from: Wug on August 28, 2013, 05:59:06 AM
Vennant doesn't appear to age because he serves drinks at the speed of light. Now you know why there's no delay on the buy code in the Gaj.

Tek doesn't know what's coming for him.
Quote from: Agameth
Goat porn is not prohibited in the Highlord's city.

Staff: "Why are you mudsexing this Templar, that's got nothing to do with your focus."

Ioreth Githfucker raises his crossbow at the sky.

Githfucker: "Focus This!



...   :-\
Quote from: Scarecrow on February 21, 2014, 04:45:46 PMIn Zalanthas, people don't dig graves with shovels, they dig them with their own tongues.

Fuck yeah, Ioreth Githfucker. I predict we've found our new Memetic Badass, fellow geedeebeers.
Quote from: Agameth
Goat porn is not prohibited in the Highlord's city.

This Summer, Ioreth Githfucker: Watch as he joins the legendary ranks of Gage Gritshaw, Samos Rennik, and that dude who made up necksnap.
Quote from: Gimfalisette
The rest of you, if you see a blingy, buff brunette-blonde pair hanging out together pretty soon at your local bar, just...it's nothing. Move along. (Do not hit on them.)

A dwarf whose focus is to collect human skin of every possible color.
He goes around, getting pieces of skin whatever way he can from humans, often resorting to murder, and hangs the flaps of skin on his wall, arranged in order of darkening hue, i.e. albino skin on the left and midnight-black on the right, with everything else in between. He spends hours at a time staring at the wall deciding where the most significant gap in his hue palette is, and then goes out trying to find skin a shade between two he already has.
BURM

Quote from: bmburmas on March 11, 2014, 12:12:48 PM
A dwarf whose focus is to collect human skin of every possible color.
He goes around, getting pieces of skin whatever way he can from humans, often resorting to murder, and hangs the flaps of skin on his wall, arranged in order of darkening hue, i.e. albino skin on the left and midnight-black on the right, with everything else in between. He spends hours at a time staring at the wall deciding where the most significant gap in his hue palette is, and then goes out trying to find skin a shade between two he already has.

Tl;dr, what I imagine when I think of dwarven foci. :P

Zalanthan reincarnate of Miley Cyrus and introduce 'twerking' to the Known. Survivability? Yeah.. no.

Quote from: musashi on May 27, 2011, 06:24:12 AM
No no you see, by date Ghost means "chased his wife around the house with his penis till she cried".

Quote from: Symphony on March 12, 2014, 05:49:59 PM
Zalanthan reincarnate of Miley Cyrus and introduce 'twerking' to the Known. Survivability? Yeah.. no.

I have already done this; can't say how, would be IC.

A vivaduan / healer anywhere with any loyalty to any group.

Quote from: Tuannon on March 31, 2014, 09:49:25 AM
A vivaduan / healer anywhere with any loyalty to EVERY group.
Quote from: Agameth
Goat porn is not prohibited in the Highlord's city.

Play an angered successful merchant tired of laws of the city states and beggars getting his sid's
Sets out start his own city under the silt sea.

Amos Ryan
"Commander, I always used to consider that you had a definite anti-authoritarian streak in you."
"Sir?"
"It seems that you have managed to retain this even though you are authority."
"Sir?"
"That's practically zen."
― Terry Pratchett, Feet of Clay