Consent should be enthusiastic. "Enthusiastic consent" means that there is a presence of a "yes" rather than the absence of a "no".
This is pretty standard. I believe this is rather important to have in all cases where consent applies. I will likely differ on that regard, though.
I view Armageddon the same way as I do an R-rated movie, despite the multiplayer experience. It's not advertised as child or family friendly. By electing to be entertained by R-rated blah blah, you offer implied consent for things that R-rated covers. That does not cover the extremes that can push it beyond that rating, hence why I don't have any issues with the current coverage of it. Violence, rough language, sexual themes (not explicit sexual scenes), drug use, etc...those are kind of expected under that umbrella, even when not omnipresent. That isn't to say I think everyone should just be an asshole about things, particularly when you know they are touchy things for some people. But I do not think a player is -obligated- to regain consent consistently to remain an R-rated theme.
I believe players should be considerate of their fellow players, but I don't think the threshold of 'deserving punishment' or extrication should be too low on an R-rated game.
I realize people will disagree, and I don't particularly feel inclined to argue over that with people who think that bar should be higher; if the bar needs to be higher, it will go higher, and my opinion will remain just my opinion (in other words, I don't believe dissenting opinions should shut down discussion or make you think you're hitting a brick wall).
I'm not certain how automating the consent process will improve things, but honestly, it might make for additional good features in the future, so I'm not really against that even if I'm not sure what value it has under shallow casual assessment.
I do disagree with your examples of raising the bar, though:
- A tattoo being forced upon your character should require consent. You are permanently changing how another character looks. Not all tattoos can be reasonably covered with clothing. Since there is no laser tattoo removal in Zalanthas, the only typical way to do it is through injuring yourself. Additionally, the context of the forced tattooing makes a lot of difference (what is the tattoo of? where is it being placed?). The context can turn a situation that does not require consent into a situation that definitely does require consent.
In no way, shape, or form are you given such high control over what happens to your character or how they look or function. Denial of this based off of consent rules seems like a stretch, but perhaps I'm in the minority on that as well. I don't think anyone should be able to force you to play a tattooing if you don't want to (though my forced tattooing was beautifully done, props to that northern Borsail player) or branding, but I'd find it odd to consider that in the same venue as other incredibly invasive topics where we allow the 'nope'.
- Whipping not requiring consent seems odd because it is clearly torturous. Just because the torturous echoes are coded into the whip's script does not mean that consent is not required. It means that the staff member that wrote the script did not do their due diligence when writing the script. The script should be changed.
I do not find the messages or this content particularly graphic in nature. If you have problems roleplaying pain after a beetle bites your character's leg nearly off, then I could empathize while simultaneously being surprised you'd want to play in the setting. But where we roleplay those sorts of scenarios often, getting battered, bruised, and hurt all over the place, I'm inclined to lean towards this being more about the former example than actual torture; it's generally a helpless situation where your character has to endure something you wouldn't choose for them, and that lack of choice is the uncomfortable part rather than the content itself.
Again, I understand that my views on this are generally regarded as callous. But it was the setting of Arm that brought me here in the first place. This roughness, this text based game that Spartacus-gladiator-braveheart-madmax levels of 'holy shit these people are crazy', is pretty integral to it...otherwise I'd just find a Tolkien mud.