Description writing tips for DUMMIES

Started by innocent bystanderd, November 06, 2003, 12:35:48 AM

Quote from: "The Dude"I started shaking my head when these guys started to look like they were just trying to nitpick and show off. Enough already, man.

You misspelled 'lame'.  Can you stir me up a caucasion?

So while we're being nitty, once I worked a very, very long time on my app.  Later, my PC needed a desc change.  I took the previous desc and reworked it, touched it up here and there, and sent it in.

It spawned my first comment (which nearly caused me heart failure, a nervous breakdown, and copious weeping) that ended up being a very nice compliment on it.

EXCEPT I KNEW THAT I HAD STARTED TWO SENTENCES IN A ROW WITH THE SAME WORD!  

Isn't that just horrible?  Don't you wish the Imms would read these descs over for such things?

Oh they do?  They're also human?  So are the desc writers?

The original post and several subsequent ones made a few good points.  Quite a few of you are getting nitty.  Some of you are bordering on catty from my point of view.

It's been said that the Imms give the newbies some leniancy on their first apps.  I can't imagine that these egrerious errors are from players who have been about nigh a year.  Let's calm down, and try and not be so nitty when posting suggestions for the newbs, OK?

I wanna know about this stirring up of caucasions though.  Is this a fancy way of asking for a vanilla frappe?
 wish I was witty enough to have something here.  Alas.

Quote from: "Miee"I wanna know about this stirring up of caucasions though.  Is this a fancy way of asking for a vanilla frappe?

If by a vanilla frappe you mean vodka, kahlua and creamer with ice.

Wow, THere are alot of assholes around here, I guess I am one of them for giving an honest opinion. As they say, the week cannot take the truth. As for creeper386 "STFU". No offence, but if I knew you, you would probably provoke me to the point of me placing my foot down and laying you out in the corner where you belong.

As for everyone else, To be short and simple, .....

I just get sick of reading bad descriptions. I sick of the "Dick and Jill" style(not "jack and Jill") and i get sick of redundancy. Also The bombastic approch of many writers can at times be very annoying, but at least they are giving some attempt at being creative. If you dont know english that well then, WHY ARE YOU PLAYING A TEXT GAME IN ENGLISH!!!!!!!!??????? I am in assumption that any of the writers who write the ways mentioned above are amatures, and just need some practice. And if for some reason you feel you need help instantmessage me at the screen name of XtrahCrisP.

I may sound crule and harsh at times, but I love you all. Except, creeper, he is one of them annoying crittics who needs to improve upon everything that is "good".

Do you all think I should rewrite my "help file" in a more presentable manner and send it to ginka as a helpfile?

Quote from: "innocent bystanderd"crittics
Wow your not even trying. Learn how to type in English if your going to post on an English discussion board.

What's good for the goose is good for the gander ;)

(I don't like it when someone attacks someone else personally so I just resort to sarcasm).

I have to say. I found your "if you don't know English why are you playing on an English mud" point of view to be elitist and more befitting of Threshold then this mud. I say if they can get their message across they can play. Do they know English? Not well. But well enough.

Hypocrisy makes me chuckle.
Keep posting, bystanderd(?)!
_____________________
Kofi Annan said you were cool.  Are you cool?

Did anyone else find that last post in particular from innocent "bystanderd" hilariously hypocritical?

I in fact venture to ask if this is all a joke. Is this a joke, man?
ust takin'er easy fer all'em sinners out there...

Personally I think critique of people's emotes, descs, says, grammar and all of that is becoming more than a little presumptuous.  Not everyone is attempting or necessarily capable of making a work of art out of their desc, but the point is to give you an idea of what their character looks like, not to get an A on the grammar portion of the contest.

In other words, leave people alone.  Some of them may be trying their hardest.  I've seen plenty of well-played PCs with minimalist descs and I've seen plenty of gorgeously written descs on PCs with some of the more abusive or boring players around.

Okay, I admit I prefer basic grammar, long sentences and as few spelling errors as possible. I'm also against using extremely exotic words that send you running for the dictionary, but I guess it just proves this game is educational.
laloc may be permadorked, but I am the Permadork!

I'm with everyone that says that "innocent bystanderd" was a bit off...I mean, I could pick apart that post for all the grammatical errors, but I wont' bother, as I have better things to do.  Just suffice it to say that there were quite a few of them.  Ah, to be an english major.
Quote from: MalifaxisWe need to listen to spawnloser.
Quote from: Reiterationspawnloser knows all

Quote from: SpoonA magicker is kind of like a mousetrap, the fear is the cheese. But this cheese has an AK47.

I think the main point of the game is to have fun, if I am wrong you are all welcome to come and watch my public suicide in a gulag within the cold recesses of Siberia.
musashi: It's also been argued that jesus was a fictional storybook character.

Quote from: "Morninglight"I'm also against using extremely exotic words that send you running for the dictionary
I think one or two per mdesc is alright. Especially if it's possible to determine what the word means by the words surrounding it ;)

To Krath with elitism. I'm not very good with english, and if you think my description is too simple, you can approach me in a friendly manner or you can simple keep your self from looking at my character.

You mean extrapolate from the contextual intimations?
Quote from: tapas on December 04, 2017, 01:47:50 AM
I think we might need to change World Discussion to Armchair Zalanthan Anthropology.

While we're on the subject of food, I like to masticate.
musashi: It's also been argued that jesus was a fictional storybook character.

Well, I know it is very hard for people not native to English to write a good description. However I dont want to scare people into quitting, if you are not native I will be glad to help you. I should not have been so cruel. I myself am not native to English, I am a Spanish journalist.... not really.  I love lying.

Anyway, I am not a nitpicker. You can have mistakes and errors, Just as long as you put in some effort. If you are not a practitioner of "Dick and Jane" style(I stand corrected) and you are not redundant then I am usually happy. I personally do not see how a typing error is "hypocritical" for it has no contradictions with any of my previous statements.

(this time I used spell check, I had 7 spelling mistakes)

When I was in culinary school our butchering teacher was this adorable little man from the deep south. He was one of those little round old men that have some how lived long enough to look like babies again. He'd just started teaching. It was is first class. And when he'd had about enough of us all, one day he said, (in his funny little southern accent) I'm not allowed to tell you all to shut up, I'm supposed to say...what was it? Oh, yeah. More quiet. please."
Varak:You tell the mangy, pointy-eared gortok, in sirihish: "What, girl? You say the sorceror-king has fallen down the well?"
Ghardoan:A pitiful voice rises from the well below, "I've fallen and I can't get up..."

QuoteI love lying.

Me three.
musashi: It's also been argued that jesus was a fictional storybook character.

Me foreigner. Me not goody goody as you in you'se language. Me now feeling bad because of me description. Me sad. You hating me ? Poor myself. Don't want to be hated by your people.

Uhm ...

What I wanted to say is: Please, some of you: be a bit more tolerant when it comes to these descriptions ... people like me whose native language is not English are having a hard time keeping up to the standards in Arm. I am trying my best to fit in, but I will never be able to express the things I want to say about my character the way native speakers can.
Come on, give me a hug. I'm feeling unwanted.  :shock:  :lol:
ever trust a grinning horse. It is always planning something.

Quote from: "sparrowtm"
Come on, give me a hug. I'm feeling unwanted.  :shock:  :lol:

Be careful, people like Faglore and CindyLou are likely to take that as an invitation to feel you up.  ;)

Anyway, do your best but don't worry too much.  I don't even read descs all that closely most of the time.  Often they are too long and dull, exposition sucks.  :P

AC
Treat the other man's faith gently; it is all he has to believe with."     Henry S. Haskins

Since English is my second language I often find myself struggling to "flesh" out my sentences just to avoid what your talking about. It´s a struggle I often lose due to being uncertain of the spelling of a word.
It´s so damn frustating to know what you want it to be but not being able to create the "flow" in the text.

Some good tips in this thread anyway. I especially found the part about commas and "and" informative and the intitial post with the tips on how to structure the description to avoid the common traps.