Prettiness Guilt

Started by In Dreams, May 27, 2015, 11:31:28 AM

Quote from: Beethoven on May 29, 2015, 11:07:32 AM
Seriously, though, everyone should be able to choose to roleplay or not roleplay sex and romance as they see fit, so long as they're paying proper respect to the docs. If you can get yourself to step out of the box and RP someone whose preferences are different than your own, whether you're gay or straight, sub or dom, breast man or leg man IRL, I commend that! However, no one should be pressured to RP sex/romance in a way that makes them feel uncomfortable. I think that's part of the reason for the "no homophobia rule," so that people who experience homophobia in real life are not doomed to relive it IG because they prefer to play according to their RL preferences.

I agree, the point to my post was that if you feel like your female characters (or your male characters) are getting treated "differently" than the opposite gender....it may very well be because sexual preferences and sexual desires play a huge role in the interactions between both genders.

Quote from: James de Monet on April 09, 2015, 01:54:57 AM
My phone now autocorrects "damn" to Dman.
Quote from: deathkamon on November 14, 2015, 12:29:56 AM
The young daughter has been filled.

I think part of the confusion is sexism versus chauvinism too.

Sexist would imply that there are traditional roles that each gender is expected to take.  There should be minimal sexism in Zalanthas, because there are no traditional roles to lend to that behavior on a grand scheme.  Could there be sexism because of a particular cultural subset?  Yes, but it would be out of place when expressed outside that culture.  Sexist behavior, outside of that, would be inappropriate to the setting.

Chauvinist would imply treating someone differently (generally in a negative way) because of their gender.  A male Arm Corporal not wanting to take orders from a woman is chauvinistic, not sexist.  It can't be sexist, because there is no standard that says a woman shouldn't be an Arm Sergeant/Lieutenant/Templar.  If there is female merchant that only hires other women because she believes they're better at it, again chauvinistic, not sexist.  There is no standard that says a man can't be florist/baker/seamstress.  

Chauvinistic behavior should be dealt with just like racist behavior.  ICly.  If someone consistently plays chauvinistic characters, then that might be a problem, but no more so than someone consistently playing griefers, sociopaths, racists, leches, or any other "negative" personality.  Then the player is potentially and repeatedly making the game less fun for other players instead of playing a role.
Quote from: BadSkeelz
Ah well you should just kill those PCs. They're not worth the time of plotting creatively against.

Quote from: Desertman on May 29, 2015, 11:21:18 AM
Quote from: Beethoven on May 29, 2015, 11:07:32 AM
Seriously, though, everyone should be able to choose to roleplay or not roleplay sex and romance as they see fit, so long as they're paying proper respect to the docs. If you can get yourself to step out of the box and RP someone whose preferences are different than your own, whether you're gay or straight, sub or dom, breast man or leg man IRL, I commend that! However, no one should be pressured to RP sex/romance in a way that makes them feel uncomfortable. I think that's part of the reason for the "no homophobia rule," so that people who experience homophobia in real life are not doomed to relive it IG because they prefer to play according to their RL preferences.

I agree, the point to my post was that if you feel like your female characters (or your male characters) are getting treated "differently" than the opposite gender....it may very well be because sexual preferences and sexual desires play a huge role in the interactions between both genders.



That doesn't bother me.

Its probably just me, and no one else.
Let's say you're playing a political role and you have power. Someone wants something from you. They don't offer you money, or an advantage or collaboration. Instead, with very little effort or actual interest they say: oh what pretty eyes you have!
Varak:You tell the mangy, pointy-eared gortok, in sirihish: "What, girl? You say the sorceror-king has fallen down the well?"
Ghardoan:A pitiful voice rises from the well below, "I've fallen and I can't get up..."

May 29, 2015, 11:32:24 AM #228 Last Edit: May 29, 2015, 11:34:56 AM by whitt
Quote from: Barzalene on May 29, 2015, 11:26:46 AM
Its probably just me, and no one else.
Let's say you're playing a political role and you have power. Someone wants something from you. They don't offer you money, or an advantage or collaboration. Instead, with very little effort or actual interest they say: oh what pretty eyes you have!

I watch female PCs do this "all the time".

ETA: Generally because sex as a commodity is "free" in Zalanthas and also because it works.
Quote from: BadSkeelz
Ah well you should just kill those PCs. They're not worth the time of plotting creatively against.

Quote from: Desertman on May 29, 2015, 10:54:19 AM

Maybe me not wanting to roleplay intimate relationships outside of what I'm comfortable with and prefer in real life makes me a bad roleplayer, and if that is the case...I'm fine with that.

It is about a lot more than the sex. I'm going to fade the sex anyways...even the straight sex. I don't want to roleplay an intimate relationship with a man. The thought makes me uneasy. I don't want to roleplay as a submissive in a straight relationship either...it feels so unnatural to me behind the keyboard that playing the role would just be an un-enjoyable and extremely taxing exercise in making the game a job to me instead of a game.

I think it's not that you're a bad role player for not exploring these things with a character so much as you're missing out on nuances you might not have predicted as being entertaining.

Say you were to try a gay character, just for instance. Don't like rping out a relationship with a man? That's fine, throw it all into the VNPC world. Your character does their kissy-kissy off screen. So what do you get out of this? Picture the opportunity to walk into a bar and drunkenly ramble about your relationship problems. It would be a story that would be genuinely new for you to tell as your character, and one ripe for exercising creativity in a way that Character #253 with woman problems just isn't.

Just try it with a throwaway character sometime. Put all the stuff you find awkward in the VNPC world, and run them through the parts of the story that you can engage in comfortable. I'll bet you a hard earned American quarter that you'll have fun.

Quote from: Barzalene on May 29, 2015, 11:26:46 AM
Quote from: Desertman on May 29, 2015, 11:21:18 AM
Quote from: Beethoven on May 29, 2015, 11:07:32 AM
Seriously, though, everyone should be able to choose to roleplay or not roleplay sex and romance as they see fit, so long as they're paying proper respect to the docs. If you can get yourself to step out of the box and RP someone whose preferences are different than your own, whether you're gay or straight, sub or dom, breast man or leg man IRL, I commend that! However, no one should be pressured to RP sex/romance in a way that makes them feel uncomfortable. I think that's part of the reason for the "no homophobia rule," so that people who experience homophobia in real life are not doomed to relive it IG because they prefer to play according to their RL preferences.

I agree, the point to my post was that if you feel like your female characters (or your male characters) are getting treated "differently" than the opposite gender....it may very well be because sexual preferences and sexual desires play a huge role in the interactions between both genders.



That doesn't bother me.

Its probably just me, and no one else.
Let's say you're playing a political role and you have power. Someone wants something from you. They don't offer you money, or an advantage or collaboration. Instead, with very little effort or actual interest they say: oh what pretty eyes you have!

Then don't give them what they want until they give you what you want. If you truly have power, then you will be able to make them realize their mistake...fatally if need be. If you can't, then you really don't have power.

I've had more than a few female PC's try and bang their way into my favor when I was playing powerful characters. Several actually. Actually, I can't even count the number I've had try it and then get extremely angry and offended when it didn't work. That was on a single PC heh. I had so many female characters try and bang their way into my favor, it became extremely entertaining for me to shoot them down constantly and secretly laugh at them, or sometimes openly laugh at them.

Quote from: James de Monet on April 09, 2015, 01:54:57 AM
My phone now autocorrects "damn" to Dman.
Quote from: deathkamon on November 14, 2015, 12:29:56 AM
The young daughter has been filled.

I never do. Oh what pretty eyes you have gets you  an eye roll. Enjoy. On your way.
Varak:You tell the mangy, pointy-eared gortok, in sirihish: "What, girl? You say the sorceror-king has fallen down the well?"
Ghardoan:A pitiful voice rises from the well below, "I've fallen and I can't get up..."

In regards to the derail, I will only say that those of you who can play through a filter on the matter of sexual orientation/preferences and not have it feel forced and out of place to you, and tack on some amount of lack of enjoyment to the character...I applaud you.

I've tried, and it isn't that I can't play it, but just that the enjoyment of it is so minimal it can essentially end an otherwise interesting and dynamic character, based solely off of all personal (not necessarily intimate) relationships turning into bumbling mishaps of my RL interpretations of how things might be.  Might've come through fine on the other side, but to me, it always felt like a patchwork, makeshift personality that was poorly implemented, and ruined the character altogether.

So again.  I applaud you.  That shit is hard, and plz don't hate me for not being good at it.
She wasn't doing a thing that I could see, except standing there leaning on the balcony railing, holding the universe together. --J.D. Salinger

Quote from: Barzalene on May 29, 2015, 11:42:51 AM
I never do. Oh what pretty eyes you have gets you  an eye roll. Enjoy. On your way.

Does your character have pretty eyes?
Quote from: James de Monet on April 09, 2015, 01:54:57 AM
My phone now autocorrects "damn" to Dman.
Quote from: deathkamon on November 14, 2015, 12:29:56 AM
The young daughter has been filled.

Quote from: Desertman on May 29, 2015, 11:43:30 AM
Quote from: Barzalene on May 29, 2015, 11:42:51 AM
I never do. Oh what pretty eyes you have gets you  an eye roll. Enjoy. On your way.

Does your character have pretty eyes?

Did anyone else just hear banjos?
Quote from: BadSkeelz
Ah well you should just kill those PCs. They're not worth the time of plotting creatively against.

Quote from: Armaddict on May 29, 2015, 11:43:23 AM
In regards to the derail, I will only say that those of you who can play through a filter on the matter of sexual orientation/preferences and not have it feel forced and out of place to you, and tack on some amount of lack of enjoyment to the character...I applaud you.


+1
Quote from: James de Monet on April 09, 2015, 01:54:57 AM
My phone now autocorrects "damn" to Dman.
Quote from: deathkamon on November 14, 2015, 12:29:56 AM
The young daughter has been filled.

Quote from: Desertman on May 29, 2015, 11:43:30 AM
Quote from: Barzalene on May 29, 2015, 11:42:51 AM
I never do. Oh what pretty eyes you have gets you  an eye roll. Enjoy. On your way.

Does your character have pretty eyes?

They usually have eyes. Two is the average. Apparently the bar is set pretty low.
Varak:You tell the mangy, pointy-eared gortok, in sirihish: "What, girl? You say the sorceror-king has fallen down the well?"
Ghardoan:A pitiful voice rises from the well below, "I've fallen and I can't get up..."

Quote from: Barzalene on May 29, 2015, 11:42:51 AM
I never do. Oh what pretty eyes you have gets you  an eye roll. Enjoy. On your way.

Some of the pickup lines IG should be illegal.
as IF you didn't just have them unconscious, naked, and helpless in the street 4 minutes ago

May 29, 2015, 11:48:04 AM #238 Last Edit: May 29, 2015, 11:49:35 AM by Desertman
Quote from: Barzalene on May 29, 2015, 11:45:38 AM
Quote from: Desertman on May 29, 2015, 11:43:30 AM
Quote from: Barzalene on May 29, 2015, 11:42:51 AM
I never do. Oh what pretty eyes you have gets you  an eye roll. Enjoy. On your way.

Does your character have pretty eyes?

They usually have eyes. Two is the average. Apparently the bar is set pretty low.

Then use your power that you have to make them realize you aren't just a set of pretty eyes...unless it doesn't really matter to you enough to do that...in which case...I don't even see why it's worth mentioning.

I've had people call my characters in game, "Pretty boy.", and things of that nature. Things obviously geared towards pointing out that they aren't a typical rough and gruff manly sort and this in some way degrades their value as a "real man". You know what I do? I kill them, or make them realize I can kill them. It stops pretty fast. That's Armageddon.
Quote from: James de Monet on April 09, 2015, 01:54:57 AM
My phone now autocorrects "damn" to Dman.
Quote from: deathkamon on November 14, 2015, 12:29:56 AM
The young daughter has been filled.

Quote from: Desertman on May 29, 2015, 11:48:04 AM
Quote from: Barzalene on May 29, 2015, 11:45:38 AM
Quote from: Desertman on May 29, 2015, 11:43:30 AM
Quote from: Barzalene on May 29, 2015, 11:42:51 AM
I never do. Oh what pretty eyes you have gets you  an eye roll. Enjoy. On your way.

Does your character have pretty eyes?

They usually have eyes. Two is the average. Apparently the bar is set pretty low.

Then use your power that you have to make them realize you aren't just a set of pretty eyes...unless it doesn't really matter to you enough to do that...in which case...I don't even see why it's worth mentioning.

I've had people call my characters in game, "Pretty boy.", and things of that nature. Things obviously geared towards pointing out that they aren't a typical rough and gruff manly sort and this in some how degrades their value as a "real man". You know what I do? I kill them, or make them realize I can kill them. It stops pretty fast. That's Armageddon.


Why would you think I don't?
Varak:You tell the mangy, pointy-eared gortok, in sirihish: "What, girl? You say the sorceror-king has fallen down the well?"
Ghardoan:A pitiful voice rises from the well below, "I've fallen and I can't get up..."

Quote from: Barzalene on May 29, 2015, 11:49:52 AM
Quote from: Desertman on May 29, 2015, 11:48:04 AM
Quote from: Barzalene on May 29, 2015, 11:45:38 AM
Quote from: Desertman on May 29, 2015, 11:43:30 AM
Quote from: Barzalene on May 29, 2015, 11:42:51 AM
I never do. Oh what pretty eyes you have gets you  an eye roll. Enjoy. On your way.

Does your character have pretty eyes?

They usually have eyes. Two is the average. Apparently the bar is set pretty low.

Then use your power that you have to make them realize you aren't just a set of pretty eyes...unless it doesn't really matter to you enough to do that...in which case...I don't even see why it's worth mentioning.

I've had people call my characters in game, "Pretty boy.", and things of that nature. Things obviously geared towards pointing out that they aren't a typical rough and gruff manly sort and this in some how degrades their value as a "real man". You know what I do? I kill them, or make them realize I can kill them. It stops pretty fast. That's Armageddon.


Why would you think I don't?

Because you said you roll your eyes and send them on their way?
Quote from: James de Monet on April 09, 2015, 01:54:57 AM
My phone now autocorrects "damn" to Dman.
Quote from: deathkamon on November 14, 2015, 12:29:56 AM
The young daughter has been filled.

Its not a killing offense.  It also doesn't get them closer to what they want.
Varak:You tell the mangy, pointy-eared gortok, in sirihish: "What, girl? You say the sorceror-king has fallen down the well?"
Ghardoan:A pitiful voice rises from the well below, "I've fallen and I can't get up..."


Insincere manipulative compliments will put you at a disadvantage. But they dont move me to acts of violence. It seems an inappropriate response. Ergo, it never occurs to my characters. This doesn't make them weak. Just sane.
Varak:You tell the mangy, pointy-eared gortok, in sirihish: "What, girl? You say the sorceror-king has fallen down the well?"
Ghardoan:A pitiful voice rises from the well below, "I've fallen and I can't get up..."

Quote from: Barzalene on May 29, 2015, 12:05:56 PM
Insincere manipulative compliments will put you at a disadvantage. But they dont move me to acts of violence. It seems an inappropriate response. Ergo, it never occurs to my characters. This doesn't make them weak. Just sane.

I'm fine with that. I'm just letting you know why I made the assumption I made since you asked....because apparently it's what you do, according to you.
Quote from: James de Monet on April 09, 2015, 01:54:57 AM
My phone now autocorrects "damn" to Dman.
Quote from: deathkamon on November 14, 2015, 12:29:56 AM
The young daughter has been filled.

Quote from: Desertman on May 29, 2015, 12:07:11 PM
Quote from: Barzalene on May 29, 2015, 12:05:56 PM
Insincere manipulative compliments will put you at a disadvantage. But they dont move me to acts of violence. It seems an inappropriate response. Ergo, it never occurs to my characters. This doesn't make them weak. Just sane.

I'm fine with that. I'm just letting you know why I made the assumption I made since you asked....because apparently it's what you do, according to you.

Having to kill people for minor offenses in order to look strong is exactly the lack of parity I was referring to. Its right up there with keleoid scarring to be seen as strong.
Varak:You tell the mangy, pointy-eared gortok, in sirihish: "What, girl? You say the sorceror-king has fallen down the well?"
Ghardoan:A pitiful voice rises from the well below, "I've fallen and I can't get up..."

Let's get this thread back on topic, guys.

Quote from: Delirium on May 29, 2015, 12:14:48 PM
Let's get this thread back on topic, guys.

Is anyone else freaking out that there hasn't been an elf derail and we are on page ten?
as IF you didn't just have them unconscious, naked, and helpless in the street 4 minutes ago

Quote from: nauta on May 29, 2015, 12:16:07 PM
Quote from: Delirium on May 29, 2015, 12:14:48 PM
Let's get this thread back on topic, guys.

Is anyone else freaking out that there hasn't been an elf derail and we are on page ten?

People would have to play more pretty elves for it to be a valid derail.

Quote from: Delirium on May 29, 2015, 12:14:48 PM
Let's get this thread back on topic, guys.

Thought we were! :)
Varak:You tell the mangy, pointy-eared gortok, in sirihish: "What, girl? You say the sorceror-king has fallen down the well?"
Ghardoan:A pitiful voice rises from the well below, "I've fallen and I can't get up..."