Zalanthan insults

[Vanth]

We staffers have been having an amusing morning with these...join in.

Djarjak: I want to make the Zalanthan insult generator.
Djarjak: We can start with "Your mother is an elf."
Morgenes: son of a parentless kank
Djarjak: Your mother is looser than a Kadian merchant...
Nusku: The best part of you dribbled down your mother's leg when she was taking it from a Bynner.
Morgenes: from an elf
Vanth: Don't you have an orphanage to fill or something?
Nusku: Depending on nationality: "I'll bet Tek's/Utep's tits are less saggy and withered than yours."
Nusku: I've known dwarves who were more interesting than you.
Vanth: What happened, did a templar cut your dick off?  Oh...there it is.  I thought that was a kankfly.
Nusku: Dumber than a spiced-out half-giant.
Vanth: Meaner than a female mul on the rag.
Vanth: Your mother is so smelly, Bynners won't even come near her.
Vanth: Your mother is so skinny, even elves won't pay to fuck her.
Nusku: Looks like you grew up boxing with muls.
Vanth: Your mother is so ugly, people ask if she's a mutant.
Nusku: Is the mutation natural, or did you have to work to get your head that far up your ass?
Vanth: Even a halfling wouldn't eat -you-.
Vanth: Are you half-gith on your mother's side, or your father's?
Nusku: Oh sweet krath. Put the hood back up! Put the hood back up!!
Shalooonsh: The rumors were true, you -are- hung like a kank-fly!
Vanth: _____ is so ugly, you couldn't even get a gypsy to flirt with them if their pockets were full of sid.
Vanth: That baby is so ugly, even a gypsy wouldn't steal it.
Vanth: That baby is so ugly, even a magicker wouldn't eat it.
Vanth: You're a strong argument in favor of mul mix.
Sanvean: Too bad the mul mix only worked half way.
Nusku: Do you think your kids will come out as stupid as you, or as ugly as your mother?

[Lavalamps]

Vanth: You're a strong argument in favor of mul mix.

:lol:

[Bullet Eater]

Damn, Vanth, you were on a roll.  :lol:  Good stuff.

[Intrepid]

:idea: You mother was an erdlu and your father stank of ocotillo.
:idea: Muk/Tek was a mutant.
:idea: Your city/village looks like it was crapped out of a mek.
:idea: How did your last slave die?
:idea: You're about as useful as a lone noble in the salt flats.
:idea: As comforting as a templar's torture chamber.
:idea: You're about as dumb as an Ironsword dwarf.
:idea: A mage just wayed.  You're late for your romantic rendezvous.
:idea: Your mother just wayed.  She misses you in the Rinth.
:idea: I love what the halflings have done with your hair.
:idea: The Krathis just love dressing and undressing you, don't they?
:idea: You crawled out of the Byn latrine yesterday, didn't you?
:idea: Got any siblings you haven't eaten?
:idea: The farms have a compost heap waiting for you.

[Kennath]

Does this thread include threats too? Or just insults?

-Ken

[Beux]

I think this is the third thread I've seen with awesome Zalanthian comments. Someone should so compile them into a complete list. Would be a very good resource for sparking the imagination.

So funny too.

[Barzalene]

Kankfucker... it's the new cocksucker

[Djarjak]

Quill dick, the vestric-fucker.

[Yokunama]

Bynner: Your breath smells like kankshit.
Noble: Do you serve anything besides kankpiss?

[Cuusardo]

Well well, look what just crawled out of the 'Rinth!

You are so ugly, when you were born the midwife slapped your mama!

You son of a gortok!

Shitcloak.

Hung like a(n) halfling/anklebiter.

[jcarter]

Anybody who uses the word "shitcloak" should be banned. "A-hurr-hurr, you guys gotta shovel your own poop!"

[Marauder Moe]

Anybody who uses the word "shitcloak" should be banned. "A-hurr-hurr, you guys gotta shovel your own poop!"

If you're not being facetious... may I ask why you feel this way?

[jhunter]

You smell like a gith's ass.

[Cuusardo]

Gith-faced kankhole

[Dalmeth]

Go sit on a pike.

[Forty Winks]

You're so fat, you could roll off the shield wall and live.

Go chew on a cockroach, that's all you can afford.

Better watch that tongue, else a magicker's going to sample it.

If Muk/Tek saw you now, he'd outlaw your entire race. (racial remark)

You're so stupid you'd forget to scream while being tortured.

You're so ugly, Borsail/Winrothol could mistake you for a new species.

You're so stupid, an elf could sell you shit and you'd mistake it for food.

[jcarter]

Anybody who uses the word "shitcloak" should be banned. "A-hurr-hurr, you guys gotta shovel your own poop!"

If you're not being facetious... may I ask why you feel this way?

First, because it's a dumb poop joke. Second, because in Zalanthas, shovelling shit probably isn't the most illustrious of careers (the equivalent of working at the car wash maybe) but likely isn't that big of a deal. Zalanthas doesn't have flushing toilets nor water to really keep those bathrooms spick and span. Most likely, all commoners have to go to a bathroom just like the Byn bathroom (albeit smaller in size), and occasionally clean it as well. This includes noble and merchant house employees.

So in a way, I'm annoyed by it because people act as if their characters don't poop, or that they poop in pristine bathrooms.

[Delirium]

Tuluki insult:
He's a bastard.

Allanaki compliment:
He's a bastard.

[spawnloser]

The Byn cloaks are not far off from the color of shit, hence 'shitcloaks' as a way to refer to them.  It has nothing to do with them cleaning out the latrines.  Calm down, jcarter.

[Jherlen]

The Byn cloaks are not far off from the color of shit, hence 'shitcloaks' as a way to refer to them.  It has nothing to do with them cleaning out the latrines.  Calm down, jcarter.

The fact that the Bynners wade through the latrines and often come out smelling like shit probably also lends something to it.

I would imagine most noble/merchant houses would have slaves for these sorts of purposes.

[jcarter]

The Byn cloaks are not far off from the color of shit, hence 'shitcloaks' as a way to refer to them.  It has nothing to do with them cleaning out the latrines.  Calm down, jcarter.

Calm down, spawnloser, you're getting all excited.

Calling someone a 'shitcloak' because they're wearing brown is a pretty lame insult in a desert world.

[EonBlueApocalypse]

Tuluki insult:
He's a bastard.

Allanaki compliment:
He's a bastard.

Heh.

[spawnloser]

How is it being a desert world different from it being NOT a desert world?  Being told you're wearing shit is an insult no matter the setting.

Editted to add: (snort) And what do you mean I should calm down?  I said you should because of your rather bold statement that anyone using 'shitcloak' should be banned.

[jcarter]

How is it being a desert world different from it being NOT a desert world?  Being told you're wearing shit is an insult no matter the setting.

Because brown is probably one of the most common colors worn. It allows desert travellers to blend in much better with their surroundings, and for other reasons. Calling someone a shitcloak because they're wearing brown is like me calling you a smurf because you wear blue jeans. It's just plain dumb.

Editted to add: (snort) And what do you mean I should calm down?  I said you should because of your rather bold statement that anyone using 'shitcloak' should be banned.

I was being sarcastic, which goes to prove the point that people can misinterpret things easily through text, such as you misinterpreting me being upset because some imaginary people call other imaginary people a name.

[Beux]

Ooo. If you two are going to bicker? Can you do it in Zalanthian please? And make it an educational experience for all of us?  :wink:

[Dresan]

Bring accused of being a half-breed...big big insult, esspecially to a human who might lose alot of job opportunities because of it

Or having sexual relations or feelings for elves...huge as well.Its a major (if not one of the few) Taboo in Zalanthian society. This can cost people alot aswell, my PC might not want to do business or employee a human who I had heard and elf for a mate....thats sick. :wink:

Your social status or rank being questioned, very insulting to say the least. For example, calling a noble a commoner or a commoner a slave...the moment that happens its not so much that someone should die, someone NEEDS to die. Some slaves (some not all) work hard all day, sleep, get fed and go back to working...no spice, no whores, no ale...its probably not something most commoner esspecially wandering independants or house employees would want.

Now i may be wrong but i do believe cleaning up the public latrines is a job the city-states get slaves to do. Therefore calling someone a shit-pusher  might be the equivilant of calling someone a slave and may put your PC in a world of hurt depending on who your calling that.

Lastly i know in Tuluk telling someone 'they are acting like nakkies 'is also an insulting...probably the reverse is true in 'Nak

[Cuusardo]

Part of your living in the Byn is mucking out latrines.  People who call the Byn "shitcloaks" are generally people who do not have to muck out any latrines.

[Angela Christine]

Or having sexual relations or feelings for elves...huge as well.Its a major (if not one of the few) Taboo in Zalanthian society. This can cost people alot aswell, my PC might not want to do business or employee a human who I had heard and elf for a mate....thats sick. :wink:

This is true, but I would expand it to anyone being attracted to any of the other races/species.  Being attracted to elves, dwarves, muls, etc is perverse.  Being attracted to half-giants is both perverse and dangerous.   :wink:   A dwarf attracted to the hairy races is a pervert.  A half-giant attracted to the tiny races is a pervert.  A halfling attracted to the too-tall races is pervert.  Nobles may be able to get away with being perverts, but it could be a problem for others.

[bloodfromstone]

Personally, I'd say a noble would be worse off. If Lady Skankpot Borsail is sleeping with an elf, she'd better keep it a damn good secret. A commoner is just going to be made fun of or be punished for being disgraceful, if they're a House employee. It could be political suicide for a noble.

[Morfeus]

Being attracted to half-giants is both perverse and dangerous.   :wink:

Derail: I remember one of my past characters accused someone else for sleeping with a half-giant. Funnily, few irl months later I found out this insult became a known "fact" and something what got back to me multiple times titled as "the last news".

Anyway, I don't see anything wrong with "shitcloaks". No matter where and how it started.

[Angela Christine]

Personally, I'd say a noble would be worse off. If Lady Skankpot Borsail is sleeping with an elf,

Would it be any better if it were a dwarf?  I don't think so.   It may be more acceptable to have a dwarf working for you, but you don't want to be known as a stumpy-fucker.  


I guess I was thinking of slaves, because slaves aren't necessarily considered people.  A noble that is secretly attracted to non-humans could probably get away with using non-human pleasure slaves.

[Tisiphone]

Which braxat did your mother have to rape for a kid?

So you're what happens when a 'breed and a mul fall in love...

Tell me, how hard do the kanks struggle the first fifty or so times?

Run back to the half-elf Drovian who owns you.

I wonder, did your face look like that before the silt horror/mekillot/sand worm spit you back out?

[rinthah!]

Code Select Expand

Mumbling to himself as he points vaguely towards the sinewy, black-haired woman with a crooked finger, you say, in sirihish:
    "One.."

His finger swiveling over to the runic, silver-haired lad, as does his sunken, tattooed gaze, you say, in sirihish:
    "Two.."

The slim, auburn-haired man turns and looks over his shoulder at you.

With the slim, auburn-haired man as the next target of his scrutiny, you say, in sirihish:
    "Three..."

The tall, pierced woman looks up at you.

To you, the pony-tailed baobab-eyed man asks, in southern-accented sirihish:
    "What in fucking krath yeh counting?"

Chuckling under her braeth as she flashes the tall, amber-eyed woman a slight grin, the scant, henna-haired woman says, in sirihish:
    "Ehh.. countin' tha' gemmahs."

At a boxy wooden bar, the tall, pierced woman speaks, slowly turning to peer at you.

The slingshot-inked man scrunches up his lips into a thoughtful purse as he stares down at three inked fingers.

The pony-tailed baobab-eyed man looks down at the runic, silver-haired lad.

You think:
    "T'ree gems in da Barrel..."

Shaking his head, the pony-tailed baobab-eyed man says, in southern-accented sirihish:
    "Ah whatever."

The pony-tailed baobab-eyed man turns back to the bar.

Peering down at the three splayed fingers as he begins to tap his foot on the ground, you say, in sirihish:
    "T'ree gemmahs...if me math be good, 'dat means..."

The tall, pierced woman turns to watch you attentively.

The pony-tailed baobab-eyed man turns to you.

Holding his three-fingers out to one side as he taps his chin with the tip of his forefinger from his other hand, you say, in sirihish:
    "...t'ree gith bi'ch mummas...an' t'ree nor'hern cocks dat made 'em preggers..."

[KingOfSpades]

How about corny jokes?

Krath! It seems that your nose isn't the onlything that smells!

Your so scary-looking that Suk-Krath needs to hide from your ugly glare two hours a day.

Your face hit every rock on the way down from the ugly cliff, didn't it?

You're dumber than an elf sneaking up on the templarate to give a surprise back massage.

[Bullet Eater]

Krath, you should really get a facewrap.

Did you forget to pull your leggings down, or do you always smell like shit?

Get a codpiece that isn't too large for you to wear.

:roll:

[ShaiHulud]

Militia Man 1 cracks, "How do ya wink at an elf?"
Militia Man 2 replies, Wink at an elf!? Eh, no.  How?

Militia Man 1 responds,
*closing one eye and mock holding a crossbow up* "Down the sights of your crossbow."