I asked about a leadership style and some how-to feedback from someone I considered epic as a player back in 2009 ;
This was the PM I received.
Other leaders and I also might have a different point of view on several topics, including harshness, as seen through a few posts on the GBD in the recent leaderships thread.
In either case, my advice first and foremost is the stereotype: Make the game fun for you. Make the character interesting for you, and keep an active part within the plots that you generate. You always have to think of new things, and how others might be involved in them. Typically, what I do is take a pre-existing situation and apply it to see how our particular clan or individuals might benefit from it. However, if your character is more interested in self-promotion, then this can clearly be swapped in the place of the former ideal. If your character isn't interesting for you, you won't last. You can't just be an order-dispensing machine, because people like that aren't realistic, and if you aren't realistic, and your sole contribution to the game is for the sake of other's enjoyment, you're going to get burnt out, real quick.
The second thing is delegation. You can have a firm stance in your plot, but you can let those beneath you do the grunt work for it. You aren't going into those alleys to collect the information yourself, your merely taking the smaller pieces provided and adding them into a much larger picture. Your minions needn't really be in on the matter, as long as the sub-plot itself is interesting enough. Eventually, you may find it ideal to let people into the bigger scope as time comes along, but, part of having others invested and enjoying the role is to make this process gradual, and it also provides incentive for good work. If I sat you down and explained the history of Oash, everything from point A to point B, there'd be nothing new for you to learn within your employment, and your commitment to your tasks might suffer from that.
This next point is where some and I differ - punishments. I am not saying you need to murder your employees at the drop of a hat, but those that feel you'll murder them and everyone that they ever loved if they had betrayed you, typically won't betray you. Sometimes, you're going to have to be the bad guy, but this is taking a apathetic approach to the situation. Especially if your in the stance of a Noble, you're not going to be weeping over a few lost commoners, you're thinking about things in a much larger scope. I've been of the belief that Nobility can feel the impact of a loss of resources, feel angered that something was -taken- from them, and emotional attachments make for a particularly interesting character flaw, but overall - Nobility aren't in the position to have 'friends'.
It's a very lonely role, as is any position of leadership. If pulling the trigger sometimes, and setting an example prevents those from making the same mistake in the future, then I feel this is more appropriate than having a Noble or Leader suddenly break character to nuture or coddle the betraying employee. In this sense, I am a realist, and I believe that consequences of such actions should be dealt with such IC.
Am I stating that death is the only solution to these problems? No - But they are a final solution to dealing with a situation, and one that shouldn't be avoided at all costs, because mercy -does- come back to haunt you (And I speak from experience).
Anyway .. So yes,
-Having fun for yourself first of all
-Delegating tasks to those beneath you and keeping them and yourself involved
-Acting realistic to situations (A believable character is much more rewarding than a coddler)
I am not quite sure if this answers your question, but I hope this helps!